Naughty Ebay?

Any seller using Ebay will know that their seller fees went up again this year. The monthly shop fees went up thus: Basic by 48%, Featured by 32% and Anchored by 23%. That's quite a jump for all of them. For those of who have continued to use Ebay, we just have to agree to it and carry on. However, Ebay appears to be even more money grabbing in a way we have not agreed to and some may not have noticed. Here is a screen grab (done today) of the latest fees. Note, in the bottom row, the auction style listing fee is £0.15 for all three tiers of Ebay Shop.

Now, in this screen grab below (also done today) note the fee Ebay charged me when I listed two auction style listings (each with a £0.99 starting price) after my monthly quota of free auction listings was used up. So to state the obvious, as an Ebay Shop owner, two listings at £0.15 each should cost only £0.30. 

£0.36 for two listings instead £0.30. An extra £0.03 per auction listing. £0.03 may not sound a lot to be overcharged by, but consider how many thousands of Ebay Shop owners that are listing auction style listings each day and might be paying £0.03 extra per listing without knowing it? 

Is Ebay being very naughty? If this is merely a software glitch, it's going to take some explaining to be convincing. 

UPDATE: I have found the reason. Ebay is, quite simply, being vague as to when and where it is now charging VAT on something. They did announce some months back that they would be adding VAT on charges made to Ebayers registered as business sellers BUT they have not spelled that out clearly enough on their fee descriptions. They are still advertising £0.15 as a listing fee for auction listings but they should have a column stating £0.18 (includes VAT) for Ebayers registered as business sellers. Their present description allows a misinterpretation that £0.15 includes VAT. It does not. It is a bit like those shops that have a price on every item in them but once you take something to the counter they announce the price does not include VAT and they produce a calculator to hit you with the real price.

For Those In The Know... Again

For Those In The Know...

All Hail Matilda

I have to say there is a big difference between Amazon.com and Amazon.co.uk when it comes to dealing with piracy. Amazon.com was very helpful in a previous case of piracy; in comparison Amazon.co.uk took the view of not wanting to get involved – and I quote “it would not be appropriate for Amazon to assist.”  I submitted the details to them more than once and each time I received the same automated reply. I suspect that it is a rare event for a human being at Amazon.co.uk to actually read any complaints on such matters. The day was saved however by my friend Matilda Lore. She lives in the next State to where Paragon OS is based and she contacted them directly on the matter and they removed their listing from all Amazon sites. Matilda is my hero. All hail Matilda.

PIRATED AGAIN?

Well, it seems my Thomas Hill book may have been subjected to product piracy again. A seller on Amazon.co.uk called Paragon OS is selling supposedly ‘new’ copies for over £60 each – even though the retail price of genuine copies is only £10.

There are two possibilities.

One is that Paragon OS is simply being dishonest in its description and they have second hand copies, not new ones - which makes the price region of £60 extremely unfair. My book is still in print, still available, and second hand copies sell for less than £10. Whoever pays more than that is being right royally screwed by the seller.

The other possibility, if the books are in 'new' condition, considering that Paragon OS have never been supplied by me or mine with any ‘new’ copies of the book, is that they have a pirate edition.

I have reported the matter to Amazon and wait to see what will happen to the listing. They have been very helpful in the past when this has happened before. I hope they are again.

The 'How' in Two Episodes of Father Brown

I enjoyed the recent series of Father Brown. I did notice something about two of the episodes.

Father Brown, series 4, episode 5, The Daughters of Autolycus.

See the short story The Duchess of Wiltshire’s Diamonds by Guy Boothby in his book A Prince of Swindlers or in The Rivals of Sherlock Holmes edited by Hugh Greene. It was adapted in the television series The Rivals of Sherlock Holmes and sometimes can be found on YouTube.

Father Brown, series 4, episode 6, The Rod of Asclepius.

See the novel Green For Danger (1944) by Christianna Brand and the film adaptation of that novel starring Alistair Sim (1946).

I won't give any further details because that will spoil seeing the episodes and reading the stories mentioned above.

The Penguin Complete Rivals of Sherlock Holmes – NOT

Most people have heard of the novelist Grahame Greene. Even if they have not read any of his books they may have seen the various film adaptations of some of his work – such as the The Third Man starring Orson Welles and Joseph Cotton, or Brighton Rock starring Richard Attenborough (which was recently remade in 2010).  However the name of his brother, Hugh Greene, is perhaps not as well known; it should be but probably is not. There is more than one reason why he should be remembered.

One reason is his struggle as the Director General of the BBC in the 1960s to update the BBC and compete with the then new rival ITV. One of his main opponents in that was Mary Whitehouse. That conflict was portrayed in the BBC drama Filth: The Mary Whitehouse Story in 2008 with Hugh Bonneville as Hugh Greene.

Another reason is, perhaps, only important to fans of Sherlock Holmes. He edited four books of early detective stories featuring detectives who could be considered rivals with Sherlock Holmes. The books are:

The Rivals of Sherlock Holmes, 1970, The Bodley Head (reprinted by Penguins Books in 1971).

Cosmopolitan Crimes, Foreign Rivals of Sherlock Holmes, 1971, The Bodley Head  (reprinted by Penguin Books as More Rivals of Sherlock Holmes in 1973).

The Crooked Counties, 1973, The Bodley Head (reprinted by Penguin Books as Further  Rivals of Sherlock Holmes in 1976).

The American Rivals of Sherlock Holmes, 1976, The Bodley Head (reprinted by Penguin Books in 1978).

In 1983 Penguin Books published The Complete Rivals of Sherlock Holmes. It is a misleading title. It only contains the first three books. The American Rivals of Sherlock Holmes was not included.  I have no idea why. In publishing The Complete Rivals, Penguin Books choose to use a large typeface and stretched the text of three books to the width of 1018 large pages. If they wanted to do so, they could have done as they did in their other books in the ‘Penguin Complete’ series, such as The Penguin Complete Sherlock Holmes which contains nine books in one (1122 pages), and used a smaller typeface but they did not. Who knows why?

Well, yes, it is not the first time that Penguin has used the word ‘complete’ in the title knowing it to be a fib. The Penguin Complete Edgar Allan Poe is far from complete but then there is a good reason; Poe wrote far too much to ever be packed into one book. The same goes for The Complete Penguin Lewis Carroll. However, the four books by Hugh Greene cannot possibly be included in that reasoning. It is, after all, only four books. I guess we will never know why Penguin made the choice they did. You can now make your jokes about how perhaps Holmes could solve the mystery. 

Animation Assistant

A temporary position will be available for an eight to twelve week period early next year for ‘inbetweener’ work.

Candidates must be experienced with traditional pencil and paper animation.

Rate of pay to be negotiated based on experience.

Send a CV to apply@johnhelvin.net

This is a temporary email address and will cease to function after the 4^th of September.

Unsuccessful applications will not receive a reply. 

Martial's Juggler

Marital was a Roman author of the first through to second century AD. He wrote  a considerable number of epigrams, covering a wide range of subjects. In this epigram he describes a young juggler juggling a small shield. While I have never seen anyone juggling a shield, I have seen a juggler juggle a tea tray in the way described. Unfortunately, YouTube does not have an example specifically of that so I chose an example of non-ball type juggling by Mat Ricardo, juggling a cane and then a hat. 

From the Loeb edition of 1920.
Martial, volume II
Book 9, epigram 38.

Summa licet velox, Agathine, pericula ludus,
non tamen efficies ut tibi parma cadat.
nolentem sequitur tenuisque reversa per auras
vel pede vel tergo, crine vel ungue sedet;
lubrica Corycio quamvis sint pulpita nimbo
et rapiant celeres vela negata Noti,
secures pueri neglecta perambulat artus,
et nocet artifici ventus et unda nihil.
ut peccare velis, cum feceris omnia, falli
non potes: arte opus est ut tibi parma cadat.

Although, Agathinus, you deftly play a game of highest risk, yet you will not achieve the falling of your shield. Though you avoid it, it follows you, and, returning through the yielding air, settles on foot or back, on hair or finger-tip. However slippery is the stage with a Corycian saffron-shower, and although rushing winds tear at the awning that cannot be spread, the shield though disregarded, pervades the boy's careless limbs, and wind and shower baffle the artist no whit. Although you try to miss, do what you will, you cannot be foiled: art is needed to make your shield fall.

The Old Napkin Trick in Compendium Maleficarum

Below is an extract from the Compendium Maleficarum. The tricks described are now a bit old hat, except when performed truly well. The napkin trick can sometimes be found in children's books of magic. Eschelles confession was very likely under torture. 

COMPENDIVM MALEFICARVM, F. FRANCISCVS MARIA GVACCIVS, 1626, page 14.

Coloniæ citabatur uirgo quædam, quæ mira in conspectu nobilium fecisset, quæ arte magica videbantur fieri: mappam enim quandam dicebatur lacerasse, et subito in omnium oculis re dintegrasse. Vitrum quoddam ad parietem a se iactatum, et confractum, in momento reparasse, et similia: manus Inquisitoris euasit excommunicata.

Narrat supra citatus quidam, quòd in Francia Triscalinus Circulator coram Carolo nono, aliàs laudato Rege, à quodam Nobili ab eo remoto pelliciebat cunctis videntibus torque annellos ad se sigillatim, eosque manu recipiebat aduolantes, vt videbatur, nihilominus mox torquis integer, et illæsus repertus fuit. Hic conuictus multorum, quæ, nec arte, nec artificio humano, nec natura fieri poterant, confessus est, opera Diabolica cuncta perfecisse, quòd ante obstinatua negauerat.

English translation by E. A. Ashton:

“A certain virgin of Cologne was said to have performed in the presence of the nobles wonders which seemed to be due to magic: for she was said to have torn up a napkin, and suddenly to have pieced it together again before the eyes of all; she threw a glass vessel against the wall and broke it, and in a moment mended it again; and other like things she did. She escaped from the hands of the Inquisition with a sentence of excommunication.

From the same source we hear of a conjurer in France named Trois Eschelles, who in the sight of all and in the presence of Charles IX, called the Praiseworthy King, charmed from a certain nobleman standing at a distance from him the rings of his necklace, so that they flew one by one into his hand, as it seemed; and yet the necklace was soon found to be whole an uninjured. This man was convicted of many actions which could not have been due to human art or skill or any natural cause, and confessed that they were the devil’s work, although he had obstinately denied this before.”